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dinsdag 12 april 2011

Funny Stuff #2: Chuck Norris & Rap

Who has not heard of the great Chuck Norris?
If you haven't, there are entire websites dedicated to the man, where they can tell you all kinds of facts about him.
Here are some of my personal favourites!

When Chuck Norris playes Charades, his contestants go deaf.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

Chuck Norris can tell u what a lethal injection feels like

Chuck Norris won a guitar battle with a violin

Chuck Norris can skip a track on a cassette

Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.

Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse-kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.

If you can hear death coming, rest assured it isn't Chuck Norris.

When you walk through the valley of the shadow of death you're actually walking through Chuck Norris' living room

The only sure things in life are death and taxes. Unless you're Chuck Norris, then they're optional.

Chuck Norris once drowned a fish underwater.

When the president pushes the big red button Chuck Norris's cell phone rings

Chuck Norris was denied auditioning for "Mission Impossible", for obvious reasons.

Chuck Norris The Film in 3D was actually banned after the first showing when a 3D roundhouse kick accidently killed the entire audience

Chuck Norris can make domino lines fall in reverse.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did. 

Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.

Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can hear sign language.

Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories.

There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic

Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience

Chuck Norris once got bit by a rattle snake. After three days of pain and agony, the rattle snake died.

Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.

Rap Battles

A youtuber named 'Nicepeter'
has created videos in which two epic characters from history ( or well.. the present) engage in an epic rap battle!
There is one with Chuck Norris VS Abe Lincoln

Currently, he also has:

Einstein vs Stephen Hawking
Justin Bieber VS Beethoven
Hulk Hogan VS Kim Jong-il
Darth Vader VS Hitler
John Lennon VS Bill O'Reilly
Sarah Palin VS Lady Gaga

Subscribe to him, it's genious :P


Bye for now!

2 opmerkingen:

  1. Chuck Norris movies???
    I don't think I've seen one....
    Aren't they wat you call "B" movies???

    No!!! They are C movies!!! XD
    ...get it?
    Chuck Norris...C...??

  2. @Karin

    Very clever :P I see what you did there!
    But yes I suppose they are.. Haven't seen any myself to be honest!